I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize