i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize