The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
