I'm going to jail i love you
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Randomize