it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
