I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
