we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
