one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
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