You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
