Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
