i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
handjob tips. give me some.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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