Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize