And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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