Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
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She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
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The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I have feelings that need drinking.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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