Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
