And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
