what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
