I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
