my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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