Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
