your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
