Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
