Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
