But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
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we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
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I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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