There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
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We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
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My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
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