If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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