Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
