Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
