Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
