so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
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