Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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