U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
