I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
