I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Randomize