I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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