I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize
