I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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