Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I see more hoeing in ur future
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize