My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Randomize
