How'd it feel making her break her religion?
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
