he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
