im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Randomize
