The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
