3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
