Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize
