your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
