Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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