Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
