don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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