i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
You are a genius and a whore.
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