I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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