I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
operation harelip BJ is a go
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
