so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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