So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
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