it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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